Kitties, I sitting here musing about desserts. Humans eat these after their meal. Sort of a delayed treat. My Mommie is absolutely obsessed (or is that obese!) about desserts. She plans her meals around them; dreams about them; and looks at the dessert section of the menu first. But I do not understand these desserts things. Obviously, this is yet another way that cats are superior to humans. You will understand this statement when I explain about the selections.
1. Pies – these are round things with a bread crust usually filled with fruit. Mommie’s favorite is cherry, with is a small, red, round, sour thing. Really? Bread and sour fruit? If a cat ordered a pie it would be Sardines with a Cat Nip crust.
2. Cake – these are also round things, usually two layers covered with an overly sweet sauce. Mommie’s favorite is Red Velvet Cake – which ironically enough has nothing to do with the color red or velvet! Now, if cats ate cakes we would have a Shrimp Cake with chicken broth icing.
3. Cookies – Again round things (what is this thing with round stuff?) sometimes with an icing inside. Mommie’s favorite is chocolate chip. Now a kitty cookie would be Silvervine flavored with tuna chunks.
4. Candy – Okay, I can’t even go there – Mommie’s favorite is Snickers. That’s right – she eats something that sounds just like the things she wears on her stinky feet all day! Humans!
What desserts would you improve upon?