Please understand, this is meant to be humorous and non-partisan. I am not encouraging anyone to vote for a certain candidate. In fact if the truth was told, I am not very fond of either candidate. Please only leave non-partisan comments.
THE CATNIP DEBATE – MODERATED BY CALLIE AND SASSY
Callie: Kitties, we are here with President Obama and Mr. Romney to debate a subject near and dear to all of our hearts – cat nip. I will be asking Mr. Romney the questions and Sassy will ask the questions to President Obama. Each answer will have a time limit. President Obama won the coin toss for first question.
Sassy: President Obama, what do you plan to do about ensuring that every cat has a cat nip plant of their own?
President Obama: Well, first off, let me apologize for being late. I was stuck in a traffic jam that was caused by ex-President Bush. It is his fault. I was thinking about this problem as I was on the plane back from single handedly capturing bin Laden. Did you know that I caught bin Laden?
Sassy: Please stay on subject President Obama
President Obama: Okay, so as everyone knows, after President Bush’s time in office, there was only 3 cat nip plants left in the world, because Bush went around and personally peed on every plant, because Bush hates cats – especially black cats. So I inherited a real cat nip problem.
Callie: Mr. Romney, what do you plan to do to ensure each cat their own cat nip plant?
Mr. Romney: I am glad you asked that Callie. I have a very good and solid plan for this problem. It is a plan with many details.
Callie: Umm, can you give us any of these details?
Mr. Romney: Yes I can. As you know, when I was governor of Massachusetts, some cat nip was bought by residents, so naturally I am an expert now on cat nip. That is how I formed this plan. That has a lot of details.
Sassy: President Obama, can you continue to talk about the cat nip issue.
President Obama: What?...oh, sorry, I was just thinking about when I went overseas to kill bin Laden…you know when I did that, I used a bullet, which meant that another bullet had to be manufactured to replace it. Our studies show that this bullet has created 16 billion extra jobs for the United States….
Sassy: Cat nip, President Obama…..
President Obama: Oh, yes, well, I am happy to report that with the help of two economic stimulus plans and 20 billion in research funds, that in the three years of my presidency, I have managed to increase the three cat nip plants to four! And I am sure that if the voters will give me another 4 years, I can increase that number to five!!!
Callie: Mr. Romney, we are still waiting to hear the details on your plan.
Mr. Romney: My plan has a lot of details. Good details created by an expert in cat nip.
Callie (hiss): Please elaborate on these details.
Mr. Romney: Callie, I would be happy to. These details are tied to a plan with a lot of details.
---TIME---Sassy: I am sorry but President Obama had to leave. He has a scene to shot on CSI, a visit with Jay Leno and a guest appearance on the Oprah show to film. He said he could not let all of this presidential stuff interfere with his Hollywood time.
Callie: And I sent Mr. Romney home because if he said the words “a detailed plan” one more time I was going to have to scratch out his eyes on public TV!