Trouble's Thursday Tales

OR

Just Strollerin' And Saving The World

Kitties, my adventure today is from last fall.  My Mommie used to take me on stroller rides last year.  She says that the weather conditions are not right to go this year yet.  I say her Lazy Conditions are why we have not gone yet this year.  (Mommie:  Now Trouble, why would you say…oh, yeah – actually she kind of got that one right)

Mommie used to try to take me out at different times of the day.  She had to do that because when word got out that I was strollerin’, the drivers would stop their cars to watch me, crowds would line the sidewalks, all screaming at me to please just give them one of my sweet meows.  (Mommie:  We went for walks at different times because of my work schedule in reality)

Once while out strollerin’, a big black limo pulled up next to us.  Now at first, remembering my undercover work against the Dog Mafia I had done for the FBI (Feline Bureau of Investigation) I was worried.  But it turned out to just be Jerry Jones wanting to know if he could rename the Dallas Cowboys to the Dallas Calicos in my honor.  (Mommie:  Well, considering the season they had last year, this might not have been a bad idea)

Perhaps the most exciting thing we had happen while out strollerin’ was the day we were surrounded by a wild pack of vicious attack dogs.  Their leader was a huge, wild eyed Rottweiler.  He was wearing a spike collar and a leather coat. The name on his collar was “Pain”.  Knowing that these  ferocious, brutal bullies could hurt my Mommie, I immediately sprang into action.  I gave one of my patented “Pay Attention” hisses.  All of the dogs immediately yelped, tucked in their tails and ran off.  I especially scared their leader, Pain.  He actually went home, saw the error of his ways, moved to Tibet and joined a monastery.  I still hear from him occasionally.  His name is now Serenity and you know for a dog with a really deep bark, he is actually pretty good at chanting.  (Mommie:  Trouble, a dog that chants?  No, just no.)